PIZZA PLEASE
Operator : “Thank you for calling Pizza House . May I have your…”
Customer: “Haloo, can I order..”
Operator : “Can I have your Multi-purpose-card number first, Sir?”
Customer: “It’s eh…, hold on……6102049998-45-54610”
Operator : “OK… you’re… Mr. Saidullah and you’re calling from 29
Dhamondi 4/A, Dhaka 1209. Your home number is 02-882-8296, your office
02-882-8629 and your mobile is 019-912-1236. Which number are you
calling from now Sir?
Customer: “Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?”
Operator : “We are connected to the system Sir”
Customer: “May I order your Seafood Pizza…”
Operator : “That’s not a good idea Sir”
Customer: “How come?”
Operator : “According to your medical records, you have high blood
pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir”
Customer: “What?… What do you recommend then?”
Operator : “Try our Low Fat Hokier Mea Pizza.You’ll like it”
Customer: “How do you know for sure?”
Operator : “You borrowed a book entitled “Popular Hokier Dishes” from
the National Library last week Sir”
Customer: “OK I give up… Give me three family sized ones then, how
much will that cost?
Operator : “That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The
total is 49.99 Taka
Customer: “Can I pay by credit card?”
Operator : “I’m afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card
is over the limit and you’re owing your bank 3720.55 Taka since
October last year”
Operator : “That’s not including the late payment charges on your
housing loan Sir.
Customer: “I guess I have to run to the neighborhood ATM and withdraw
some cash before your guy arrives”
Operator : “You can’t Sir. Based on the records,you’ve reached your
daily limit on machine withdrawal today”
Customer: “Never mind just send the pizzas, I’ll have the cash ready.
How long is it gonna take anyway?”
Operator : “About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can’t wait you can always
come and collect it on your motorcycle…”
Customer: ” What !”
Operator : “According to the details in system, you own a
Scooter,…registration number E1123…”
Customer: ” *’!^ *%^**%^I7*”
Operator : “Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 15th July 1987
you were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman…
Customer: [Speechless]
Operator : “Is there anything else Sir?”
Customer: “Nothing… by the way… aren’t you giving me that 3 free
bottles of cola as advertised?”
Operator : “We normally would Sir, but based on your records you’re
also diabetic……. ”